The Final Challenge

This morning was the final challenge of this month's boot camp...so I've completed my 5th cycle.

Anyway, Shelley drags us outside and announces that you must partner up with someone of the opposite fitness level of you. Woohoo! These are the days that make-up for every fat kid picked last for dodgeball. Speaking of, I wonder if she'll let us play one day?! Anyway, fat and slow people are hard to find in boot camp and this one was snatched up first! By. Freedom.

Let me paint this scene for you- you know the movie Twins with Schwartzenagger and DeVito? Beauty and the Beast? Pinky and the Brain? Michael Jackson and Brooke Shields? Yep. Freedom- athletic, cheerleading coach, fast runner, hot husband. Jocelyn- slightly obese, fast food dining coach, fast reader, no husband.

So- we have to do an exercise 10 times and then run a lap. Here's the catch- if one of us (let's just say, Freedom) happens to finish first, she has to start the next exercise and keep going until I finish. Then we do 20 of a different exercise (or until the slower person, hypothetically, me) does 20, and run. Then 30, 40, 50. You get it? If you get to 100, you work your way back.

I'm exhausted from returning to workouts, I've got this hip thing going on, and I am DYING! My amazing partner, however, puts her cheerleading skills to work and encourages me nearly every step of the way. She could've lapped me a bagillion times (like everyone else), but she didn't.

We made it to 80 basketball jumps and it was almost time to go. I was certain we weren't going to have to run the last lap. Ha! I was wrong. Annette helped me while Shelley tried to encourage longer steps.

I lived AND I got Freedom to do the chapstick and the pony and the cheer. So it was worth it. Of course, watching BOB get his butt chewed and not know it (thanks to earphones) was great too. But the best part might have been discovering that Shelley is simply a human water fountain.

This boot camp was fun because it brought new friends, a new haircut, time to see my pal Kristen, and the crew was in the house. It also brought an after picture that makes me look skinny!

Our next boot camp starts on Tuesday. I hope it brings lots of fun, Red Rover and dodgeball.

The End.

She's Baaaaa-aaaaack

So all of my fans have been begging for a new blog. First Shelley and then my mom. I don't want to disappoint the two of them ;)

I took a little hiatus from working out and blogging. I wasn't feeling well and could've slept for days. Basically, I just wanted sleep and carbs. It was odd. I finally went to the doctor, had lots of blood drawn and found out something important- I was tired. My doc told me sometimes my body is smarter than me (and him) and knows when I need lots of rest.

Anyway- I'm baaaaaa-aaaack! I returned to boot camp yesterday and it felt so great to be surrounded by my people. We were outside (thanks to election day) and did a team "relay". For once Shelley let me and my crew be on the same team. Then she decided to participate, and I figured out why she didn't break up the crew. She wanted to join it!

Truth is, it was all fun and games until Freedom (who by design took the role of the other team's captain) started developing cheers for her team. Then it became hilarious. I also had to have a talk with BOB. He's a fairly funny guy, and I'm not certain the 5 am comedy stage is big enough for both of our acts. We discussed a way to make it work.

Okay, so...first I decided to do a 5K in October. I signed up in like April for it and HAD plenty of time to train. Remember- I'm still at a 13 minute mile. Then I was peer pressured into signing up for the Warrior Dash a week before the 5K. Still, I HAD plenty of time to train. Note to self: START TRAINING. Now, my genius self is going to run the Monkey C 5K. It is NEXT weekend. Ummmm...might need to run a little?

I decide to be a cool kid and join the Wednesday morning runners (I'm not sure that's their actual name, the real one may be way cooler). Here are some things I thought about as I once again reached for destination among the cool running kids:
1) Where do you put your keys when you run?
2) Water?
3) Should I wear pants or find somewhere to store my phone? Clearly wearing shorts is a fire hazard and I may need to call 911.
4) How in the H.E.Double hockey sticks will I ever keep up?

I slowly figured out the answers...buy a car with a keypad (or run with a friend that has one), chew gum, pants, keep dreaming.

I'm running with the following: a marathon person, a half-marathon/mom of 100 kids/fitness teacher/beauty queen, a girl who owns a jogging skirt (and I was worried about the shorts fire hazard!), a chic who is running almost a 5K a week, and a great friend.

I was going to get behind. I knew it. However, I again fell to peer pressure and joined the group out on the open roads. Thank goodness for my friend. Do I think she could've kept up with them? Yes. Did she? No. She ran with me, walked with me, and pushed me to run a little more. We were far behind about a half-mile in. Let me be clear- I didn't want to slow the pack. I was worried I would, so I am thankful that I didn't. Of course, it was nice to chat and catch up a little too...when I could breathe.

I did almost 2.5 miles. That's not bad. I walked more than I ran, but that's ok too. The rest of the day provided me with aching muscles.

I don't know if I'll ever meet the goal, but I want to do a half someday. I guess I'll start with a 5K next week. In the meantime I will practice. I probably should blog more too...

What you get is not what you see...

I mean, I know that isn't how the saying goes, but it is my reality now. I've passed the 40 pound threshold. I started my journey on March 13, and 5 months later I've lost 40 pounds. My closet is getting emptier by the weekend...but the eBay profits are hitting the cruise account :)

Here's the problem- I don't look any different. When I look in the mirror, I see 263.5 pound Jocelyn. When I am in a picture, it's 263.5 pound Jocelyn. It's so darn frustrating. That is coupled with the fact that people don't notice. I mean, it's back to school time. Im seeing faces I haven't seen in a while. If they aren't reading this or seeing the news on Facebook, they don't know that I'm losing weight. Y'all notice and tell me how proud you are, and I do appreciate it. I guess it's a little of that whole "your mom has to say you're pretty because she's your mom" thing. So I wonder if people can really tell or if they just are being sweet. Make sense?

I'm a huge Advocare fan. I feel like it was what really kicked off my success. I use the 24 day meal plan to guide my daily life and live for a Spark in the morning. I say all of this because a number of my gym folks have done the Arbonne 30 Days to fit diet- and have had great success. I promised to do it with them this month. This month?! The month that is my craziest of all 12 at work, where my partner at work is on medical leave, the month when a family member (8 hours away) is diagnosed with kidney cancer and has to have a kidney removed? Good thinking.

There are so many people who have great success on this diet. Heck, I lost almost 8 pounds last week. Am I eating enough? No. Am I completely miserable? Yes. Did I fall off the wagon today and get completely run over by it? Heck to the yes. However, I refrained from a ham sandwich because as I told my mom, "You know I would've put mayonnaise on that b$tch."

So I am struggling. I'm a people pleaser- never want to disappoint. I've got a bet riding on the success of these 30 days. I also had a Superintendent look at me today and ask what was wrong and I slept a chunk of the weekend away. I also don't do well with falling off the wagon. I'm an all or nothing person, and half-donkey success feels like failure to me.

Anyway. I'll figure it out. I want to do what is best. This is what I know. This diet totally works for some people (just like Weight Watchers for others). I'm down 40 pounds in five months. I have a great support system (check that: the greatest). This is the most Debbie Downer blog I've ever written. Tomorrow is a new day :) The end.

Bleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep

Sadly, the title of this blog has been censored by the FCC.

I went on vacation. I went away for one whole week of rest, relaxation, white sandy beaches and crashing waves. Okay, so really I traveled with the Rainman and 17 (yes, 17) family members. I'd love to tell you all about it, but it will have to wait. You see, I returned to the gym this morning.

Let's be clear. I missed ONE day of pre-vacation pump due to a bladder infection from the land down under (and I don't mean Australia). I missed ONE day of post-vacation Pump because I took Benadryl at 12:30 AM to prevent death by choking on my swollen tongue. The way my darling sHELLey acted, I'd been laying (lying?) in bed for weeks, snoozing the alarm and saying, "to hell with working out."

Truth is, I think she was trying to make me mad- and it was working. Between the snide texts I received and her pre-boot camp comments, I was in full pissed off mode before we even started. She was earning every curse word I'd ever said.

So- what's my lovely welcome back greeting? A darn (see? I'm trying to clean it up) timed mile. First, I wore my pretty shoes- so I wasn't getting them dirty on the red clay outside. An inside mile is NINE laps. Ugh.

Brenna (who used to be my friend) was given the task of running with me and pushing me- and timing me. My flipping inhaler didn't work and I was mad. Let's just say that Brenna (who really is still my friend) shouldn't repeat ANYTHING I said in front of her kids.

We ran three laps before I had to walk a bit. Stacy joined us at the start of lap 6, and by that time, I didn't have enough air to get a curse word out. I walked a little more. By lap 8 I was certain I would die. My lungs were ready to explode. I knew. I was almost done. My time to beat was 13:52.

Apparently I turned into Rocky at the beginning of lap 9. I took out my earbuds, threw my iPod to the ground and RAN. The other two knew the time, and I heard Brenna tell Stacy, "Don't say it out loud." Honestly? I thought I was going to be slower, hearing that pushed me more. I had 2 corners to go.

When I finished, I stumbled. My legs were jello. I could not breathe. I was so glad to be done (and shut her the sHELLey up), that I felt tears rolling down my face. I might've sobbed, but I didn't have enough breath.

My time? 12:55. I beat last month by almost a minute. To me, the most important detail is that my original time just a few months ago was 16:16. My goal for August is 12:16. It will be my 4 month boot camp anniversary, and cutting 4 minutes off my time is how I'd like to celebrate.

We all need different methods of motivation, and I need Shelley. I need her to push and challenge me. Sometimes I need her to mother me, be my friend, and other times I need her to piss me off. That's what is so great about her. She, like any amazing teacher, understands the needs of her students. Each student has a different "learning style" and she works them accordingly.

I also need my crew. I needed Brenna and Stacy to push me- without making me cuss them. I needed Melanie to help me breathe when I thought I would die. I needed Tracy to check on me, and I needed sHELLey to prove wrong. :)

I Like How It Feels...

So I haven't blogged yet this month, but I did get to spend some extra time with my Granma, so I know I'm forgiven :).

The theme of July is today's title, simply because Les Mills is trying to kill us all- but wants us to enjoy the death. Last weekend was the GCC's launch. I got to take my mom and her friends to check out how I exercise. Celeste did Body Pump with me, and Mom and Sue did Body Attack. I did them back-to-back. I swear there are a bagillion push-ups in every class now. Plus enough squats and lunges to make your legs want to fall off.

The Launch was my first time "pumping" with Shelley, and that was fun. There was also a new to me instructor. I don't actually know her name, but after 5 seconds of teaching, I looked at my friends and said, "Strawberry Shortcake". She's cute as a button, red hair, and NICE!?!?

I also did Body Combat again- holy smokes- it works your shoulders!! Melissa was so fun to watch teach it, because like Shelley, it is clearly her favorite class to teach. She lights up the whole room. For some bizarre reason, she told me I fight like a girl. Ummm...duh! I am a girl. I was just proud that I've learned to punch without tucking my thumbs!! I also realized that, like at a dolphin show, you should be warned if you're in the splash (READ: sweat) zone in that room. Ick!!

July brings a new boot camp that starts Tuesday. I'm praying I can get a faster mile! It also brings a week without Shelley to push me- apparently she gets to vacation like the rest of us. Plus, I'll be away at the beach for a week. Temptation much??

We shall see how I do! I'm working on. A nickname for Freedom- she taught Attack alone yesterday and has earned those stripes :)

Vacation...Or is it?

So, I was planning my trip to Lafayette. I planned my night out with friends, a party with family, some "dates", and my special eating places. I also planned on a few days of not working out. Well, you can't spell sHELLey without "hell".

The day before I'm to leave, I get a text from HER. It has the Newtone Fitness Center group fitness schedule and two words, "no excuses". Holy flipping cow. We all know I follow what my leader says, so I get right on it. I have two friends that workout at Newtone and were willing to help a sista out.

In 4th grade I had a friend named Bob. He's still my friend and his name is still Bob. Anyway, he was so cool AND he's a black belt in karate. So, he was showing off his mad skills one day at recess and I got to hold his hat. It was the coolest day ever. I tell this story to say that Bob's beautiful girlfriend, Bri, is one of new my L-town workout buddies.

My other workout buddy, Dawn, is actually an instructor at Newtone. We became friends through mutual friends and she is amazing. She's also workout hot. In case you don't know what that is, workout hot is when you admire someone's looks at the gym in a non-sexual way.

Anyway- Dawn and I went to do Step. There was this bandana mafia there- about 5 women, ages 60+, in their bandana headbands and they were kicking tail. There was also an old Chinese woman, who weighed maybe 80 pounds, and she did every high option at full intensity. I was just trying not to fall off my step or trip over it.

We stayed for Pump. Dawn was practicing teaching the first half (she did great) and Bri came to workout with me. They have metal plates, and it would drive me CRAZY to hear that clanging all the time. It was fun to do a workout I am comfortable with. Of course, that enabled me to watch Molly Meth Head. This chick was in regular clothes and tennis shoes, clearly a regular bra (without any support), more tattoos than my family has, and she was just there to socialize with her friend...or maybe score some drugs. I don't know. I know she did every exercise wrong- and didn't try, and talked the entire time. Ugh!!! Plus, she cleaned up her weights during stretch time- and we all know how I feel about that ;)

It was so fun to workout with Bri and Dawn. I was proud to watch my friend work towards her certification, and see how others teach. Of course, the best part was bragging rights of "working out for 2 hours".

The Big Reveal...

So, last weekend was my first time seeing the bulk of my family since the weight loss journey began. Of course, many of my friends and family know that I am trying to lose weight because I annoy everyone with my constant updates :)

I was quite nervous about my trip. Would people feel obligated to say something, even if they didn't notice? Would anyone really see a change? Would people be disappointed in the lack of change? You can tell my mind was racing!

Of course, I was also facing MAJOR temptation. One of my favorite things about going home is the food. I have to have Pizza King, a Boilermaker and onion rings from Dog N Suds, a drink or 12 from the Custard, Don Pablo's. I also try to get my donuts, Arni's, cookies from O'Rears, and anything else I can fit in my belly. So, I packed a small cooler with granola bars and Spark. That helped with the temptation of the candy aisle at gas stations- especially Pilots and Flying Js with great selections and crushed ice!

My mom "noticed" my weight loss, but she's my mom. You know, the one who tells you you're beautiful even when you're a fat tubolard. My cousin, Arielle, commented on it. I don't know if she's following my journey or not, so that felt good.

Friday night I went out with a bunch of high school friends, and they all noticed. Of course, they're all reading this too, so they know about the journey. My friend, Bill, has lost 50+ pounds and we started the Advocare journey together. His wife lost 20, and is skinny!! So it was a big reveal for all of us. I am so proud of them!!

Even when having a family gathering on Saturday, the only people who mentioned the weight loss were the ones who knew about it. I'm not going to lie- that stung a bit. I was really hoping people would just notice. Honestly? I shed a few tears over that this weekend, because it was so flipping discouraging. My next goal is to make those people notice! So there.

I also really did well finding a balance between satisfying my cravings and not falling off the wagon. Yes, I had Dog N Suds and Pizza King (and paid for it), but I cut back on my portions. I skipped the donuts and O'Rears. I had a granola bar instead of a cinnamon roll, and drank water or Coke Zero. I allowed myself 2 flavored cokes from the Custard.

Of course, my cousins, Rainman, and I had the Igloo 32. It is 32 scoops of ice cream, loads of banana and toppings. We didn't even finish 8, but we had fun trying it ;)

I also worked out while I was home, but that is my next blog....or your bedtime story if you're Herbie or Dove!