Wedding Jitters

Let me be clear, I don't have a doubt in my mind about the man that will become my husband tomorrow. He's perfect. We laugh, poke fun, love, console and are best friends to each other. We've been through a tornado that could've taken his life, a blizzard that lasted about a week, death and turmoil. I know he's "the one" and he will be an amazing daddy to my little girl. 

It's not him that makes me nervous. It's marriage. The institution. The lifelong commitment. It's the 50% success rate. I don't know many people who are successful at marriage. It's not like becoming an engineer or a chemist. They don't have classes or textbooks or continuing education. 

My parents are divorced. Their parents are divorced. I have a handful of aunts and uncles who haven't been divorced. Friends divorce- it's so easy. I've been married once before and I was HORRIBLE at it.  

How do you guarantee success? How do we stay secure in our relationship so that we don't fail? How do we stay IN love and not just love each other? How do we handle being two (incredibly) independent people merging into one household. 

You see, that blizzard is the longest we've ever "lived" together. Yep- we've taken vacations, but never alone for that long. We stay together on the weekends, but we maintain two households. How do we handle finances without allowing them to come between us? How do we raise our daughter to be an amazing, loving little girl without screwing up? How do we avoid being "those parents" at a restaurant. You know, the ones that sit in silence with each other and only talk to their kid? How do we make important decisions about where to live, what to do for holidays or whether to allow our daughter to date? 

I honestly don't know. I wish I did. Truth is, I'm a horrible student- so even if they had the textbook and the class- it wouldn't help me. I sure hope that my own mistakes will teach me a lesson or two. I cross my fingers that we'll remember never to go to bed angry and talk stuff out. I pray that we provide an example for Harper Grace and show her what a loving relationship looks like. Heck, maybe we can show ourselves. 

Thanks everyone for the prayers and the well wishes- I hope they don't end tomorrow. Yep- that may be the easiest day of our journey together.